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Ladies, Enjoy These 5 Ways To Have A Better Orgasm

Disclaimer: Elise Ho, aka “Dr. Ho” is a Holistic Health & Life Coach. Dr. Ho is NOT a medical doctor, licensed therapist, lawyer, or a bevy of other things. Products or services that Dr. Ho believes in are the only ones that she recommends. Dr. Ho may receive compensation, product, or an affiliate commission on anything you see on this site. This is a personal Website solely reflecting Dr. Ho’s personal opinions. Statements on this site do not represent the views or policies of any organization with which I may be affiliated.

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The more you worry about having an orgasm the less likely you are to have one which brings us to our first tip for having a better orgasm (or one at all).

  1. Stop worrying. This is a time to enjoy the activity. Women have a way of getting in their heads and in that can break the connection with their partner. Perhaps you are concerned that the kids may walk in (invest in a lock), you are self-conscious about how you look (he is just excited to have sex and absolutely not focused on what you think of as your flaws), or you are so hyperfocused on trying to achieve orgasm that you are virtually making it impossible to have one.
  2. Exchange some love before the “loving.” Hand holding, cuddling, and kissing all release oxytocin. This “feel-good hormone” can help with achieving orgasms. There has also been research that oxytocin strengthens a man’s attraction to his partner even when not in the throes of passion. That is a win-win.
  3. Foreplay. In order to achieve orgasm, it is necessary for extra blood flow to the genitals. Women will especially benefit from clitoral stimulation.  Tips and techniques for that include varying pressure, alternating movements, and using your tongue, toys, or fingers. For more tips read this excellent article.
  4. Exercise. General exercise can allow you more stamina, confidence, and control over your body. Exercising the vagina muscles can help to increase enjoyment for both you and your partner, bring blood flow to the, oh so important, pelvic floor (this is where the magic is) and help to increase arousal. Plus it is just fun knowing that you can squeeze him without even using your hands.
  5. Experiment with new positions. I say this one with a bit of caution. Do not go crazy and try complicated positions that cause you to have to concentrate on not falling off and hitting your head. Instead explore different positions until you find the one, two, or ten that work best for you. Many women like to be on top so that they have more control over the tempo and overall stimulation. Where others may prefer the missionary position.  For more on sexual positions, you may enjoy this article.

And here are a few bonus tips for  you:

  1. Stop faking it. How is your lover to know that you are not fully enjoying yourself if you are faking it?
  2. Teach your lover what you like. Explore on yourself and see what brings you to orgasm, or simply tell him what you do, and do not, enjoy what he is doing to you. He can take it and will actually appreciate it (just be nice).
  3. Alcohol and some foods can negatively affect sexual performance and enjoyment. That post is coming to the blog very soon but for right now just sit with that knowledge.


If these tips did not get you to the big “O” do not worry as there are plenty more where that came from.


For one thing, you may be interested in learning about some pretty awesome sex positions.


As with all things if a medical problem is suspected you should consult your healthcare practitioner. Once that is ruled out then it is time to play, have fun, and see where the ride takes you. There are many health benefits of sex.

O… remember that sharing is caring so if you enjoyed this post, or it helped you in any way, I sure would love it if you shared 🙂 

If you have any questions, thoughts to share, or other suggestions please do comment below.


Please use the comment section below to share your tips, questions, and/or thoughts about this post.

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Naturally Yours,
Elise Ho
Ph.D., D.N. Psych.
Behavioral & Mental Health Specialist

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12 thoughts on “Ladies, Enjoy These 5 Ways To Have A Better Orgasm”

  1. Hi Elise Sis,
    This Was Wonderful Information Sharing out Out Standing Work, One Point interesting Stop worrying. This is a time to enjoy the activity. Keep Up The Good Work,
    Have a Nice Day Ahead,

  2. These are great tips for women to enjoy their orgasms. I find it is really helpful to see what’s going on while we are making love if it is possible. That helps me to enjoy what we are doing more.

  3. Dr. Elise,

    Great tips if you’re with a loving and caring partner.
    One lady I know was faking orgasms for the first few years of her marriage – and – when her husband found out he just could not get over it and could not forgive her. They divorced.

    First problem is faking orgasms. If there is something you need from your partner it is important to find a time and a way to ask for it – not easy but necessary. Many of the couples I work with do struggle with communication problems, especially when it comes to sexual needs and desires.


    Dr. Erica

    1. Dr. Erica –

      You are spot on… this advice is definitely for those in a loving and caring partnership. We both know that if that is the not the case then the advice would need to be drastically changed.

      Sexual needs and desires can be a prickly subject. It is wonderful for couples to seek the help of a caring practitioner to try and work through those issues. It is sad to hear what happened to the woman whose marriage fell part but years of lying can do that.

      Dr. E

  4. Elise,

    You are right on the money with this one. Take it from an old experienced gal lol. I think the first thing is to feel good about ourselves so there is no inhibitions. And yes, what we consume does effect us. Alcohol, although people think they need it to “loosen up” does inhibit an orgasm.

    Teaching your lover what you like is a must. They will appreciate it, just never be shy about it. And indeed, stop faking it! If it is not working it’s fine!


    1. Donna,

      Thank you for your comments. I absolutely think of you as experienced but “old” is absolutely not a category that I would put you in. Inhibitions is one of the biggest orgasm inhibitors, we just get lost in our thoughts an dself doubt. No matter how good your lover is that can be a point of no return. So we teach our lover,limit alchol and try to see ourselves through our lovers eyes and we should be on a great path to the big O.

      <3 Elise

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About The Author

Dr. Elise Ho

Dr. Elise Ho

Dr. Elise Ho is a Holistic Health & Life Coach with a special interest in emotional health, life alignment, and energy flow.

Elise will partner with you to align your mindset, your energy, your home and your career so that you can live your life's desire with freedom and love.

Elise offers 30 years of experience and multiple certifications and degrees including a Ph.D. in Natural Health and a doctoral degree in Naturopathic Psychology.